[STEP BY STEP GUIDE] Traditional Marriage/Bride Price List in Afikpo, Ebonyi State

Marriage in Afikpo, much like in other parts of Igbo land, is a sacred union that follows established customs and traditions. Once a man finds the woman he wishes to marry and both agree to live together as husband and wife, preparations for the marriage begin. These preparations unfold in three major stages, each guided by the principles of the land.

The Three Stages of Marriage

1. Declaration of Intention
The first stage begins when the man visits the family of his bride-to-be to formally declare his intentions. He goes with a bottle of wine known in the Afikpo dialect as mia nkuma adakwa m, meaning “they should not stone me.”
This symbolic act serves to announce his interest in their daughter. Without it, village youths may treat him with hostility, but once he performs this rite, he is recognized as a serious suitor.

2. Presentation of Marriage List
The second stage involves the man returning to collect a list of items required by his in-laws according to Afikpo tradition. These items form the foundation of the traditional marriage, and without them, no wedding can take place.

3. Payment of Bride Price
The final stage is the payment of bride price, after the groom has gathered the required items. Some elements of the list are negotiable, depending on the bride’s kinsmen and the groom’s background. This negotiation ensures fairness and balance between the two families.

Marriage Rites in Detail

Beyond these three stages, marriage in Afikpo involves deeper cultural practices that prepare both bride and groom for their new roles.

The Fattening Room (Ino Nhiha)

Comparable to egbela—the informal initiation of boys into manhood—the fattening room (Ino Nhiha) is a period of preparation for girls, especially the first daughters (Ada). This seclusion marks their transition into womanhood.

It begins at the maiden’s first menstrual cycle, signaling maturity. Her mother and elder women then educate her on the responsibilities of womanhood: cooking, managing a home, caring for her husband, and raising children.

The maiden’s head is shaved, and a goat (ewu nhiha uba) is slaughtered for her. She sits on its skin to grind camwood (uhie), which she uses as body ointment. A rope (atula) is tied around her waist to signify puberty, and she wears wrappers dyed in camwood during her seclusion.

During this period, her fiancé supports her with toiletries, kerosene, tubers of yam, and fish on specific market days. Her future mother-in-law provides camwood, tested by elderly women for quality. The maiden remains indoors, stepping out only at night under chaperone. The duration of seclusion depends on how quickly her fiancé completes the marital rites.

Nhiha Ula (The Marriage Proper)

The proper marriage rites involve wine-carrying ceremonies performed by the groom for both the bride’s paternal kin (Umunna) and maternal kin (Ikwu).

• Wine Carrying for Umunna (Father-in-law’s side):

• Mpala Eka

• Imari Ulo / Nkuma Adakwam

• Ntuye / Ibumayi

• Dressing the father-in-law

• Settlement of traditional labor obligations (three years’ worth of farm work, fencing, and building), usually paid in cash after negotiations.

• Wine Carrying for Ikwu (Mother-in-law’s side):
This is a simplified version of the Umunna rites, involving wine presentation and settlement of symbolic labor costs.

• Ibu Ulo (Home Establishment):

• Dressing the mother-in-law

• Dressing the bride, whose final attire is chosen according to the groom’s taste and ability.

Conclusion

Marriage in Afikpo is more than a union between two individuals—it is a journey through customs that emphasize respect, responsibility, and preparation for family life. From the declaration of intention to the fattening room and the detailed wine-carrying rites, each stage reflects the values of the Afikpo people: honor, discipline, and continuity of tradition.